Thursday, February 16, 2006

My Sick Child, Who Also Isn't Feeling Well.

Isn't she just adorable? I can't figure out if she is more adorable when she smarts off to me constantly, whines 24/7 or maybe, it is when she tries to note all MY flaws.

Everything in life is a drama to her. Sometimes it seems she just looks for anything to be mad, upset, or spastic about and the loudness of her voice is earth-shattering.

Every night, when things seem to be quieting down, she begins her "noises". It can be pounding on a table, humming, singing, or anything else that causes one's nerves to snap. She always has the last word and it is usually something a child would have died for, years ago, if they said it to their parents.

After she has succeeded in creating chaos and misery for all around, she then states the "Everyone is mean to me" and the "Why don't you yell at anyone else?". We have been down this road a million times and I still cannot convince her that yelling at Travis for just passing by on the way to his room wouldn't make much sense.

Most people say it is a cry for attention, so I have addressed that and tried to give her positive attention, but she usually beats me to anything good to say by making sure the second she walks in the door, she is throwing her bookbag violently on the table, bitching at me for not picking her up (her bus drops her off one block from our home and I am working and have Brooke), complaining that she is too hot or too cold, whining about hunger, and then telling me something wrong about...... me.

The boys started learning long ago that no peace would be found with Cassie home, so they usually gather at a friend's house or threaten to move out when really fed up with her destruction. I hate that she is hell bent on upsetting the entire house. When she sees that everyone in the house is beyond stressed and upset, you can see this little smirk of satisfation. It makes me blood boil!

What hurts the most is that I thought I would be the coolest mom to a girl, that we would sooooo get each other and life would be great. I seem to get along with most everyone else. I have tried everything. But how do you help someone thats main goal is to be intolerable? Who, even worse, actually gets a kick out of it?

I have read that the mother-daughter relationship is the most complex and conflicting of any other realtionship. I am now a true believer too. All I can do is keep trying to draw out her good points, compliment her any chance I get, hope it is a 13 year "phase" that will be ending soon, and pray for mercy.


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