Maybe Tomorrow
Today was my big secret. Today I was going to take 30 days to get healthier. I meant to start June 1st, but June 1st came and I forgot to notice, so I changed it to June 2nd.
Then I woke up this morning and ate cereal that was bad for me and made nutty buddies and ate a handful of them. I was up late last night and Cassie was talking to me til 3am and Brooke woke me up at 8am and I was too tired and unhealthy feeling to start today. My tired body was screaming for chocolate and a quick energy boost. I caved and plus, I already ate the cereal and junk.
So, with the weekend coming, I wondered if I should just wait until Monday to start the "new healthy me" project. I thought about my friend that stopped smoking right before Christmas and actually stuck with it. Of all times of the year, all the stress and crap that comes with Christmas, BUT she did it and that should inspire me, right? If she can do that, I can certainly try to quit during the somewhat carefree days of summer and I should not let a weekend stop me from starting an exercising, eating right, taking vitamins new way of life. Right????????
Wrong...I am already stressing about starting Monday, let alone tomorrow.
On a heavier note, my cable was turned off today and I had to pay four hundred bucks to get it back on because this really nice guy that came to make sure all of cable lines were in order in the new house was actually charging dearly for the kindness. Then after I give them the house payment money they inform me that my new bill of 245 dollars is currently due, but not in "shut off danger" for a few weeks. I said "245???? My bill used to be 140 a month, why 105 more??" Her reply was "fourteen movies bought at 3.99 each and a pay per view fight for 40, plus the extra taxes and fees, blah blah, blah". My kids are SOOOOOOOOOOOOOO in trouble!!!!!!
I remember when my extended cable was 14.95 a month and come to think of it, we were happier then!! All the excess is killing me. Maybe I should put my budget on a diet and torture my kids instead of myself. Basic cable, no digital box, dial-up internet, and no cell phones. Wait, that sounds like torture for me too. But I think I could give up a few things. Hmmmm, the concept of it all, the trimming of expenses could keep me obsessed for days...seriously, how can you start a healthy way of life with all that on your mind?
Light bulb...what if I did both at the same time. What if I made lists, lots and lots of lists, and did calculations of cut backs and calories all at the same time? Could I be that ambitious??? Probably not, but all of a sudden I feel inspired to try.
Am impossible dream? Maybe. But it is a start and even impossible dreams have to start somewhere. I could actually do this, and if I did, no one would be more shocked than me.
Why do I feel like I just opened a can of worms I will be making excuses about for weeks to come then?? God...I know me so well.
Then I woke up this morning and ate cereal that was bad for me and made nutty buddies and ate a handful of them. I was up late last night and Cassie was talking to me til 3am and Brooke woke me up at 8am and I was too tired and unhealthy feeling to start today. My tired body was screaming for chocolate and a quick energy boost. I caved and plus, I already ate the cereal and junk.
So, with the weekend coming, I wondered if I should just wait until Monday to start the "new healthy me" project. I thought about my friend that stopped smoking right before Christmas and actually stuck with it. Of all times of the year, all the stress and crap that comes with Christmas, BUT she did it and that should inspire me, right? If she can do that, I can certainly try to quit during the somewhat carefree days of summer and I should not let a weekend stop me from starting an exercising, eating right, taking vitamins new way of life. Right????????
Wrong...I am already stressing about starting Monday, let alone tomorrow.
On a heavier note, my cable was turned off today and I had to pay four hundred bucks to get it back on because this really nice guy that came to make sure all of cable lines were in order in the new house was actually charging dearly for the kindness. Then after I give them the house payment money they inform me that my new bill of 245 dollars is currently due, but not in "shut off danger" for a few weeks. I said "245???? My bill used to be 140 a month, why 105 more??" Her reply was "fourteen movies bought at 3.99 each and a pay per view fight for 40, plus the extra taxes and fees, blah blah, blah". My kids are SOOOOOOOOOOOOOO in trouble!!!!!!
I remember when my extended cable was 14.95 a month and come to think of it, we were happier then!! All the excess is killing me. Maybe I should put my budget on a diet and torture my kids instead of myself. Basic cable, no digital box, dial-up internet, and no cell phones. Wait, that sounds like torture for me too. But I think I could give up a few things. Hmmmm, the concept of it all, the trimming of expenses could keep me obsessed for days...seriously, how can you start a healthy way of life with all that on your mind?
Light bulb...what if I did both at the same time. What if I made lists, lots and lots of lists, and did calculations of cut backs and calories all at the same time? Could I be that ambitious??? Probably not, but all of a sudden I feel inspired to try.
Am impossible dream? Maybe. But it is a start and even impossible dreams have to start somewhere. I could actually do this, and if I did, no one would be more shocked than me.
Why do I feel like I just opened a can of worms I will be making excuses about for weeks to come then?? God...I know me so well.
posted by Sunny at Friday, June 02, 2006
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